Willpower is a myth.
Humans are not capable of sustaining behaviors inconsistent with our core belief systems for prolonged periods. It’s possible by forcing a change in behavior we alter our core beliefs but that is a very difficult process. It is also the primary reason so many crash diets or workout routines fail.
People who make significant, permanent changes in their lives do so because the new behavior aligns with their core beliefs. They believe they are worthy of a better life and make choices consistent with that belief. We have a limited capacity for making choices which are inconsistent with our own sense of worthiness.
If we believe we are unworthy, then our choices will reflect it. The good news is that if we believe we are worthy, our choices will reflect it as well. By cultivating our self-worth we can change all sorts of behaviors that otherwise would be impossible to alter.
Willpower is the myth. Develop your belief in your worth and you’ll never fall for that myth again.
You are allowed to have as much time as you need to sort your shit out.
You are NOT fucking allowed to lead me on, make emotional love to me and build up my expectations, only to let me down in the moment so you can be the “good guy.”
On Christmas Day:
So here's to 2018 and learning to be the parent, sibling, and lover I've never had, to defeating shame, and to striving for wholeness of self (or whatever the fuck that is).